Never Play with Women -- A Joke!

This piece of joke I received now as I opened my mail box.Though why not to share it !

NEVER PLAY WITH WOMEN

The FBI had an opening for an assassin.

After all the background checks, interviews, and testing were done, there
were 3 finalists.


Two men and a woman:

For the final test, the FBI agents took one of the men to a large metal
door and handed him a gun.

We must know that you will follow your instructions no matter what
the circumstances. Inside the room you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Kill Her!


The man said, 'you can't be serious, I could never shoot my wife.’ The agent said, 'Then you're not the right man for this job. Take your wife and go home.'


The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about 5 minutes. The man came out with tears in his eyes, 'I tried, but I can't kill my wife.' The agent said, 'You don't have what it takes. Take your wife and go home.'


Finally, it was the woman's turn. She was given the same instructions,
to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the woman.


She wiped the sweat from her brow.


'This gun is loaded with blanks' she said. 'I had to beat him to death with the chair.'

A reassuring poem !

Someone mailed me a poem, it is so assuring, I thought to share with you. In fact, gone are the days, full of leisurely hours, when we could visit a pub regularly or a point where friends met. The modern times ( having been drifted further from the way Chaplin portrayed in his famous film)hardly spare us to meet and seek assurance or share our joy and sorrow. Now, read the poem, I hope it is reassuring :

You are never alone, I am always near,
When your troubled, down or blue.
All you have to do is call me,
I am always here for you.
It does not matter where I am at,
It does not matter when.
When you need someone to talk to,
I am here to be your friend.
If you need someone to hold your hand,
or a hug to say I care.
If you need a shoulder to cry on,
for you I will be there.
So never think you are a burden,
when the weight gets to be to much.
You might find if look hard enough,
a good friend could be the right touch.
You are never alone, I am always here,
through the good times and the bad.
I am always here to be your friend,
I do not like to see you sad.